


Favorite Friend

by WitchyTwitchy



Series: Leave The Past Behind [1]
Category: Escape the Night (Web Series)
Genre: 70s AU, Boys Kissing, Fluff and Angst, Implied Sexual Content, Loneliness, M/M, Mat is Bad at Feelings, Mutual Pining, So is Manny, The Crimewave Prequel no one Asked for, They Are Idiots, but they're in love anyway
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-29
Updated: 2020-06-29
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:35:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24955426
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WitchyTwitchy/pseuds/WitchyTwitchy
Summary: maybe it was a bit selfish, but during moments like these?  mat's never felt closer to a person.[ aka ; mat and manny pre crimewave ]
Relationships: The Detective | Matthew Patrick/The Record Producer | Manny MUA
Series: Leave The Past Behind [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1848568
Comments: 11
Kudos: 17





	Favorite Friend

**Author's Note:**

> This work literally killed me, and since this was my longest oneshot ever, there are definitely spelling mistakes or shit that doesn't flow that I missed and didn't fix up! I apologize for that. I hope the work is still enjoyable with those in it. 
> 
> A prequel wasn't something I ever thought I'd write for Crimewave, but after the cult gave me the idea, I gave it a go! Tons of other scenes happened, obviously, but I just didn't write them!
> 
> ( Yes, this work finally reveals that Mat - in Crimewave - is an unreliable narrator, thanks for noticing )
> 
> Anyway, please enjoy! And special thanks to the cult on discord for inspiring me to finish this!

_**prologue**_. 

1970s brought a lot of traffic to the small town of Everlock, and Mat doesn't ever forget a new face. This town was  _ his  _ town after all, he knew everyone in it. So, when he heard about some record producer building a studio, his curiosity made him scope that person out specifically. New buildings were a rarity in the old, carnival town; and he wasn't exactly sure how he felt about some city boy making a studio here. 

The building will take a few months, but that doesn't mean he can't walk past the construction daily, eyeing the progress with wary looks. Sometimes, he even sees the record producer there, tapping his chin while he talks to the workers. Mat still doesn't know his name. 

Days pass by with ease, and soon he starts seeing the new guy everywhere. Mat works late into the night in the station, only letting himself leave early morning, but now on his way back to his place; he always spots the producer heading somewhere around that same time as well. The first time they both notice each other, they pause. Honey brown eyes narrowing to take in the other's face with more detail. The producer smirks, raising a hand to wave his way, which he returns back with less eagerness. After that exchange, he turns around and keeps heading his own way. Most days he catches the man on his way out, except now neither of them stop to wave. They share a look before walking off, and that's all there is to it. 

The detective  _ swears  _ he isn't stalking the guy. But after a while of watching, he decides he might as well put a name to the pretty face. Colleen is eager to share any information with him, grinning widely as she claps her hands together. 

"The producer? His name is Manny!"

Slowly, he gains more information about Manny. He knows the producer is competitive, clever, and extremely talkative. That he loves to hang around Nikita, an old frenemy of Mat's, and that he really, really likes to flirt. He watches the producer make flirtatious advances on anyone, and most of the time they work. He clearly knows what he's doing. Matthew  _ almost _ admires him for that. 

And soon months pass by, with the building finally being finished. The whole town practically celebrates, crowding around the building and in Fat Man Slim's. He can't deny that he's impressed. The place looks lovely, neon welcoming sign and all, in his small town. And maybe, since he's so used to seeing Manny, he's kinda glad the guy was staying for a long time. Why else would he build a building here? His stay wasn't temporary, and Matthew doesn't understand why he slowly clings to that idea so much. 

While everyone celebrates, he stands outside the arcade, leaning against the wall as he tosses his badge back and forth between his hands. Shouts and laughter echo up and down the foggy streets, and a small smile spreads across his face. Sure, he's on duty to make sure nobody takes the celebration too far, but he can't deny that he's happy to see the joy floating about. And it's all thanks to Manny. Maybe they should build more buildings for the people? 

If only Mayor Janet was a more agreeable mayor, then perhaps that could be a possibility. But from the looks of things, the record studio was going to be the only new building for a long, long time. 

"I was wondering where you were!"

Mat's head snaps up, eyes narrowing in suspicion when he notices someone approaching. Confusion hits him when Manny comes into view, smirking at him with gleaming eyes. The producer? Was talking to him, after all these weeks of seeing each other? The detective blinks, before straightening his back and acting untouchable. 

"Is something the matter, sir?" 

"Oh, not at all, detective. Just didn't see you anywhere today, made me miss the usual view."

The flirtatious comment just  _ barely _ gets a blush on his cheeks. Mat raises an eyebrow, unimpressed. "What, have you already slept with every guy in Everlock? Is that why you're flirting with me, now? I won't take the bait."

His biting reply makes Manny laugh, the producer coming over to lean against the wall next to Mat. 

"I'm just pulling your leg. I really came over here to properly introduce myself."

"I already know your name. And, considering how close you are with some of  _ my  _ friends, I'm going to take a wild guess and assume you already know mine, too?"

"Are you always so good with these wild guesses?" Manny makes a gesture with his hands. "Because you being right all the time is bound to be annoying."

Matthew squeezes his eyes shut, to refrain from rolling them and seeming even more rude. "Just go away. I don't know what you're expecting to get out of bugging me."

Despite his plea, the record producer remains rooted to his side for the rest of his night. Sending him glances, flirting, and trying to nudge him out of his shell. It's annoying, almost  _ endearing _ if he let himself go that far, but that didn't mean Matthew was going to make friends with the man. He already had his hands full with the friends he has - the last thing he needs is to add more people to manage onto that plate. 

But with every shove back, Manny moves more steps forward. It's like playing tug of war. And Mat finds himself to be quickly losing. 

It's  _ nothing _ . He convinces himself that this relationship will go nowhere. Even if he finds himself in Manny's company more and more, he reminds himself that they truly have no  _ connection  _ to even be friends. The producer will get bored eventually and leave him alone. Manny seems like the type to leave when he gets bored, and all of Matthew is, frankly, boring. 

Or at least, that's what he thought, until he starts coming to meetups with his friends seeing Manny among them all. A big smiling forming on his ridiculously attractive face whenever Mat saw him. 

At this point, he wasn't sure what to do except to keep pushing Manny away. He could be in the friend group all he wanted, but that never meant that they would personally be friends. 

Yet, despite this firm statement in his mind, he isn't sure how much longer he can keep up walls when someone is so easily breaking them. 

  
  
  


_**act I.** _

"Matthew, truth or dare?"

The immaturity of this all makes him scoff, shaking his head as the group of friends around him giggles. He joined these people because he didn't want to spend the night alone, while all his friends got to hang out. Though he's now regretting his choice. Even someone like Safiya seems giddy, a rare smile on her face as she eagerly whispers to Ro. 

He's really only here to please the jet-setter, he thinks, as he watches her smile. 

After a moment of silence, he looks back at Joey, who seems to be enjoying this all too much. As much as he wants to pick truth, he knows he has to do a dare at least once. The last thing he needs is for everyone here to think he's a coward or something. 

"I choose…. dare." 

At this, he hears his friends gasp around him. There's something pleasing about it, which causes him to puff out his chest proudly. Usually, he rarely surprises people, but he finds himself liking the fact he never fully follows everyone's expectations of him. Seeing their faces of awe, shock, and disbelief makes him smirk. Dares were scary, yes, and he hates them, but it was worth the risk to get moments like this. 

What catches his eye, though, is the fact that Manny - yes, the  _ record producer _ of all people - doesn't seem surprised by his move at all. There's a grin forming on his face, and the slightest hint of interest flickering in his green eyes. The male places his hand on his chin, looking at him with his own pride. It's such a bizarre sight that it almost takes his breath away, his throat closing up with confusion and awe. The producer had been an odd addition to the group, almost an unwelcomed one for the detective, though he was getting used to seeing the producer among them. Mat kept his distance still, unsure if Manny held their awkward beginning against him, but he can't deny he was starting to like seeing him around again. 

Mat is so wrapped up in staring back that he doesn't hear Joey shouting at him. Not until Roi, who sits beside him, punches his shoulder. He jerks away, hissing as he rubs at the sore spot, quickly realizing that he has most likely been caught staring. His cheeks flare up, but nobody seems to care much. 

Joey sighs, "Hello? Anyone in there? I said the dare!"

"Sorry, I, I uhm-" He wants to steal another look at Manny, to see if the other is still looking at him with the same expression, or if it's died down by now. "I didn't hear you."

At this, Nikita snaps up, voice clipped with annoyance. "He said you have to wear the workout outfit for us."

Workout outfit? His face contorts into a puzzled one, frowning as his eyebrows pinch together. He looks around at everyone and sees their amused expression, and he even hears some of them chuckling to themselves. What was the workout outfit? Mat turns back to the blonde male, watching Joey clench his stomach as he wheezes. What was so funny? 

Colleen jumps to her feet, grinning like a madwoman. "Oh, you're going to hate this! I can't wait!"

The disco dancer rushes towards Roi's closet, seeing as they had decided to crash his apartment for their hangout session, and he starts to feel his stomach sink. He's starting to regret taking the dare, especially since he's so self conscious about his body. Mat hates revealing clothing because he knows he looks unappealing in it. There was nothing nice to say about any of his body. Matthew was too skinny in most areas, and his skin easily bruised from the slightest hits. It was so embarrassing, especially since he knew he was stronger than most, and yet he still had a terrible form. 

His gaze snaps up when he hears his friends' gasping at something, causing his eyes to land on the outfit Colleen was holding up. Mat's mouth goes dry. 

"He doesn't have to wear it!" Rosanna protests loudly. She turns to him, looking sorry. "Matthew, you don't have to wear it."

Before he can thank her, Roi speaks up, sounding cautious. "Everyone else has done their dares, and some of them were worse than putting on an outfit…"

"But one of his biggest insecurities is his body!"

At this, Mat wheezes, heart pounding as Rosanna announces that fact to the whole world. He knows she's trying to help, but now everyone's looking at him oddly and he wants the ground to swallow him up. 

Teala hisses at the jet setter, "Rosanna!"

"I didnt- I was just trying to-"

"God, I'll wear the outfit alright?" Mat finally speaks up, his voice louder than he was aiming for. "I'll wear it, just- Just give me it!"

He stands up in a hurry, wanting to get this over with as quickly as possible. Mat storms over and snatches the outfit from Colleen's hands, the girl suddenly seeming sympathetic about the whole thing. But he doesn't want her pity, or anyone else's, he just wants to prove that he can do this and then go home with the excuse he has to wake up early tomorrow. When he looks around, he notices that everyone - save for Nikita - seems to look pitiful now. And he hates that more than anything else. The detective scoffs, reminding himself that if he can put himself in danger everyday, then he can wear shorts for his friends. Even if this thought doesn't soothe him in the slightest. 

"Didn't Roi buy another workout outfit?" 

Out of everything he was expecting to hear, Manny asking such a question like that wasn't one of them. He stops walking towards the bathroom, turning around to glance at the producer. 

The daredevil seems glad to focus on something else rather than the off mood that's fallen on the group. "Yeah, I totally did! Jc said he wanted to match me."

Manny nods at that, and surprisingly turns to look up at Mat, with an expression he's never seen before on his face. "You want me to match with you?"

Those words throw the detective in for a loop. Brown eyes widen as he frowns, immediately feeling as if this was some sort of joke. His grip on the outfit tightens, and he resists the urge to grab at his badge. "Uh-"

There wasn't anything to really say to that. Was this supposed to make him feel better? Mat looks the male up and down, which Manny catches onto with a smirk. Maybe he could divide the attention if the other dressed up as silly as him? He thinks the producer is attractive, sure, but he doubts even he could pull off this silly outfit. There's something nice about the offer, and he finds his gaze becoming tender as he stares down at Manny. Finally, after only a few seconds, he gets his thoughts in order. 

"Sure. If you want. It's not your dare, but I'm not going to stop you." He shrugs his shoulders and looks away, trying to appear unfazed. 

The man nods, already getting to his feet with a huff. Mat's free hand reaches out, about to offer Manny help, before he thinks better of it and lets it fall back to his side.

While he goes to grab the other outfit for his  _ not yet friend _ , he hears Nikita snarking off about what the producer is doing. 

"This is lame. It's not even your dare!"

"So?" He hears Manny reply. "It seems like fun. I love to dress up!"

"You're only doing this because you like-"

Nikita falls quiet by the time Matthew makes his way back to the living room to hand the outfit off. He's surprised she cut herself off like that. The detective walks to stand beside Manny, whose cheeks are red for whatever reason, and pushes the outfit into his chest. When it's taken from his hands, he heads towards the bathroom with the producer behind him. He's pretty sure he hears Colleen making a sexual joke as they leave, but the immature joke doesn't phase him too much. 

It becomes clear they'll have to change separately, seeing as Roi has only one bathroom. He stops outside the door with Manny next to him, and he wonders who's going first. His shoulders tense at the thought of him being the first to be seen in the shorts, but he'll do it. Mat wanted to prove he could do this. 

"I'll change first!"

Okay, so he wasn't going first after all. The moment he glances at Manny, the producer just gives him a smile. 

"I'm just excited to try the outfit on! I've never worn something like this before!"

"Oh, you haven't worn something ugly before? That's not shocking. I've seen your wardrobe."

Despite the harsh sarcasm laced in his tone, he really did mean it as a compliment. For as long as he's known Manny, the guy seemed to only wear things he looked amazing in. From emerald jumpsuits to fashionable sweaters, he never was seen in anything that would ruin his image. Well, until now, apparently. And maybe he's a bit of a sadist for thinking it, but he's excited to see Manny in such an outfit. Hopefully it would make something about him unattractive, or else Mat might have a problem on his hands. 

His rudeish comment seems to be taken in stride, since the larger male coos at the comment. "You like how I look?" 

"I wouldn't go that far-" Matthew teases, feeling slightly better at the light atmosphere. "-I said your clothes were fine, but I'm pretty sure your natural features could use some work."

Manny gasps, mocking offence as he places his hand on his chest and leans away. It's amusing enough to get a  _ giggle  _ of all things out of the detective, which he skillfully turns into a cough to hide it. The producer brushes past him to enter the bathroom, giving him a flirtatious smirk before he closes the door, and it affects Mat more than he wants to admit. The flirting is something he's used to by now, but it seemed to dig at him more these days then it did before. He finds himself looking down at his shoes to forget about it. 

However, since he no longer has Manny to distract him, he's soon faced with what he has to do again. Matthew feels somewhat better that he isn't alone in this dare, but that doesn't mean he isn't freaking out about it still. All he wants to do is go home and get ready for work tomorrow, and yet he's stuck doing this. It doesn't help that the longer the producer takes to get dressed, the longer he's stuck in his own head. 

While he wouldn't call the other a friend just yet, he can't deny that he appreciates the effort Manny has continuously put in to get closer. Matthew has  _ still _ rejected every advance thus far, stubborn to push the other away, and yet the producer never wavered. The dedication and loyalty was nice...Even if he's still cautious to admit it. 

Oddly enough, his cautious nature seemed to disappear the moment he was alone with the other man. He would let down his walls a bit and forget about the doubts he has when it comes to accepting Manny as a personal friend. It's almost like the other made him not think at all. A scary thing to be able to do to someone like him, since he loves his mind over all else. 

Mat absentmindedly rubs his thumb over the fabric of the white shirt in his hands, and only stops when the door opens back up to Manny standing there, looking more shy than he's ever seen him. 

Though he can't fathom why. The moment he lays eyes on the record producer, his jaw drops. This shouldn't be possible. And oh no, he definitely is starting to realize he might have a problem on his hands. Because no one,  _ absolutely no one,  _ should be able to look good in everything. And yet here Manny was, rocking the workout outfit that would look ridiculous on everyone else. It just wasn't fair, and his mind  _ almost _ humors the idea of the other male being some sort of magical being. 

Once the ebony haired male sees his reaction, his confidence melts back into him. As if he had been more nervous for Mat's reaction over how he actually felt. "I see you like it then?" Manny smirks, looking down at the detective smugly. 

He snaps out of the weird haze with a vicious shake of his head. "Don't put words into my mouth!"

"You're right. Why do that when your feelings are written all over your face?"

"I-" Realizing he has nothing to say about it, he snorts. "Step aside, please, I have to change too."

"Oh, but of course, sir!" 

Of course Manny mocks a bow, and steps out of the way. He doesn't expect anything less of the man at this point. Dramatics was something the whole group seemed to be skilled in. Rolling his eyes, he still purposely brushes Manny's shoulder as he makes his way past. Turning around to wink at the producer before closing the door.  _ Ha,  _ hopefully that gives the other something to overthink about while he gets changed. Turnabout is fair play, after all. 

All of his playfulness disappears when he sets the clothes on the sink counter, slowly remembering now it's his turn to look like a fool. He swallows nervously, before he starts to drop trou. First goes his button up shirt, and then his pants. The moment he's naked, an uncomfortable feeling draws over him like a cover. Matthew looks at the mirror and flinches, whirling away from it entirely. It says a lot about himself that he can't even stand to see himself naked, even when he's alone. 

"Hey, uhm, Manny?"

Weakness overcomes him and he can't stop himself from trying to coax Manny into conversation despite the door between them. 

"Yeah, Matty?"

If he could roll his eyes into space at the nickname Manny has never dropped, he would. "Matthew." Is all he says back, before continuing on. "I just wanted to ask how you're liking the town so far?"

The question is lame, but he just wants to hear the other ramble. It'll make him feel better, and distract him enough to put the clothes on. He waits as Manny pauses, arms wrapped around himself to provide some cover. 

"Well, I've only been here for what? A year now? I definitely like the carnival aspect, because-"

And with that, the producer jumps into a whole rant about the town of Everlock, making Mat smile kindly. He listens intently the whole time he starts to change. Occasionally jumping in with his own comments whenever Manny seemed to be waiting for them. The conversation is nice, and does more for Mat than he's sure the producer will ever realize, and he finds himself very  _ interested  _ in how Manny's mind works. There's more to him than the guy he first met, a fact he's starting to like more with each passing second. Hell, there's a fondness already eating at his chest. A thing long overdue to settle in after all the attempts Manny has made to be friendly with him. 

After securing the red headband around his head, he's done with putting on the outfit. A minute passes as he just stares into the mirror with darkening eyes, already fretting about how terrible he looks. The fact the red shorts are so, well,  _ short  _ is what really makes him worried. His legs are something he's deathly insecure about, more than anything else, and he knows it's silly but damn, he can't stop being weird about this, can he? 

Besides, he has to face the music eventually. Mat turns to look at the door now, already imagining how Manny will react upon seeing him. The producer will try and hide a laugh, or snicker and look away. He'll find this look funny and amusing and he'll hurt Mat's feelings, even if he knows the other wouldn't mean to do that. Being a detective has trained him to be ready to face any and all confrontation, so he tries to man up when he goes to open the door. His eyes squeeze shut for a millisecond before he finally swings the door open. Mat faces Manny as bravely as he can, trying to look unnerved as he waits for the other to react. 

And react he does, but not in the way Mat had been expecting. The producer mirrors the exact expression the detective had earlier, his jaw dropping and all. But then it changes. Manny grins, eyes lightening up with an emotion Mat can't name, and he lets out a cheer. A  _ cheer _ of all things. Matthew is taken aback. 

"Wow! I can't believe what I'm seeing! You look so  _ pretty,  _ Matty- Oh my God."

Pretty? Him? Mat blinks, not even paying attention to the blush rising to his cheeks. "What are you on about? I look- I look like a chicken!" 

"Bitch, you're blind if you think that! Are your sunglasses really just glasses?" Manny taps his chin, "That would make sense, actually…"

"What? No! It's- Manny, you don't have to lie to me! I know I look terrible. It's fine, really! You can just laugh!"

Manny's face falls, "Why would I laugh? Sure the outfit's ridiculous, but it's not funny enough to laugh at! Besides, you didn't laugh at me either."

He squirms in place, finding himself weirded out by the sincerity in Manny's voice. Matthew ignores the way his heart is beating erratically, blaming it on nerves rather than the compliments, and decides to move past this situation entirely. He's uncomfortable with the topic, but he does appreciate Manny's efforts. Enough so to not even comment on them. 

"Well," He starts off, lips curling into a weak smile. "Let's not keep them all waiting."

The producer grins, letting the topic go, much to his relief. "Ready to give them a show they'll never forget?"

"Ready if you are, partner!" 

Mat winks again at Manny, who chuckles and sends one back. His friend ( because he's sure they're definitely friends now ) offers his arm out, with a mischievous glint in his eyes. The detective pretends to think about taking it, relishing in how awkward that makes Manny look, before he entwines their arms together. Both sharing a secretive grin before they start to walk back to the living room arm in arm. There's something about this contact that makes the detective feel a bit breathless, but he manages to hide it when they continue to engage in conversation. 

Manny looks at him softly, "You can hide behind me if things get too much for you."

"As if I would ever do that." Mat huffs, "I have to do this."

"That's fair."

"But do be careful, because if you keep offering to shield me, I  _ will _ use you as a meat shield for bullets one day, mark my words!"

"Bitch! I'd like to see you  _ try-" _

They banter the whole walk back. And even if the situation that followed embarrassed Matthew Patrick for life, he does feel glad that Manny decided to experience it with him. The friendship that started to form that day is a rare one, and before long, Mat finds himself clinging to it like a lifeline. 

  
  
  
  


_**act II.** _

Arguments are the worst. Fighting with someone you care about dearly is always a pain, and it's why Mat is such a people pleaser. Especially when it comes to his friends. Fighting with any of them made him feel like his heart was being ripped in two, especially when it came to fighting with someone like his little Ro. 

It's why he sympathized greatly with what Manny must be feeling right now. 

Everyone had been getting along fine today, but something happened and Nikita snapped off at their record producer. Matthew recalls the tension in the room while the troublemaker yelled at Manny, who looked close to crying as he kept trying to talk back to her in a normal tone. Stuff happened, Manny blew up ( and yelled, something that had scared Mat to the core ) and now everyone was doing whatever as the two best friends tried to cool off. 

Nikita wasn't his favorite person, but he did feel bad for her. He knows whatever happened between the two must've bothered her something fierce for her to go off like that. Yet he knows the other girl wouldn't want his company, so he decides to seek out someone who might need him; Manny. 

Convincing the producer didn't take long, since Manny wasn't nearly as stubborn as he was, and now they were finally walking towards Fat Man Slim's together. The detective had promised the man a milkshake, after all. As silly as it was, he always felt better after a good milkshake! Some part of him was hoping that somehow, in some way, that it would end up helping his friend too. 

Mat casts a look towards the producer, gaze hidden underneath his orange sunglasses. All he sees, though, is Manny looking down at his shoes as he walks, his hands stuffed into his pockets. The fight got to him bad, that much rang true. And now his friend seemed to be putting on some kind of blank mask. Manny's eyes looked empty; lips drawn into a straight line. There didn't seem to be anything wrong on the outside, but Mat knew him better than that. 

They were emotionally connected now. After two years of friendship, Matthew knew Manny like he knew Rosanna. So he  _ knows _ that mask he's putting on meant something was deeply fucked up within him. 

The only issue was that Matthew was too nervous to say anything. He's nosy, yes, but he cares for Manny so much that he's scared to ruin anything by opening his mouth. Besides, he's never known Nikita personally, which meant any advice he had would fall flat. Someone like Safiya or Joey was better suited for helping the producer, but Mat couldn't get the other male off his mind- so now, here he is, dragging Manny to Fat Man Slim's for some milkshake. Great. This couldn't have been a  _ better _ plan at all. 

Feeling like the biggest fool in Everlock ( even compared to those clowns ) he frowns to himself, feeling relieved when they finally get to the doors of the bar. Mat almost trips over himself in his hurry to hold open the door for his friend, who regards his action with a bland look instead of with the usual smugness. Yup. Manny was definitely fucked up. The detective's shoulders tense as his friend wanders inside, and he takes a moment to breathe before following the other in. They're seated with ease by a couple waitresses on roller skates, which Matthew smiles at, before the hard part of the afternoon finally shows up. 

_ Talking  _ to Manny. 

This case would be a tough one, he thinks, as he watches Manny look out the window boredly. But for his friend, he was willing to do anything if it meant he'd feel better. Matthew would move mountains if Manny asked him to, even if he knew he couldn't, he would still try. And that's what mattered the most, the fact that the detective was willing to try. 

"I like the strawberry milkshake!" He tries to make small talk, smiling hopefully. "But I know they have tons of different flavors! Pretty sure the menu has them! Let me just-"

Manny cuts him off, his voice unusually quiet. "I actually would like the chocolate milkshake." 

His hand freezes midair, from where he was reaching for the menus, "What?"

The producer sighs, folding his arms on the table before he rests his head there. He doesn't even bother to repeat himself, and that drives a wedge into Mat's heart. At least he heard what the guy said, the 'what' had only been his surprised reaction to the fact Manny already knew what shake he wanted. The detective sends him a pitiful look before he looks around the place. People watching until their waitress comes. 

Ordering for them was weird. Anytime they hung out together, just the two of them, Manny was always the one to order. The producer was so energetic and eager to talk to anyone, even if it was some waitress who just needed their orders, and the fact he wasn't ordering for them now was really getting at Mat. This whole situation was, actually. And he was surprised about how hurt he was over all the events.

Perhaps it was an overstep in boundaries, but he believes he has an idea that could get his friend's attention. 

He smiles at their waitress. "A big chocolate milkshake with two straws please?"

As expected, Manny's head snaps up, his expression borderline hilarious. 

The waitress raises an eyebrow, before smirking and placing one hand on her hip. "Oh, of course. Lover's special, coming up!"

If the producer's eyes got any more larger, he was sure they would pop out of his skull. Manny turns to the waitress to say something, but she's gone before he can find the words. Mat chuckles, which causes him to get a look sent his way. Yet he doesn't feel bad in the slightest. If that's what it took to get his friend to at least talk to him, then he was more than willing to sink that low. 

Though the flustered look was new. His friend's cheeks were a bright shade of red, and Mat wasn't exactly sure why. Had that moment been embarrassing? He hopes not. 

"What was that about? I thought you wanted the strawberry milkshake!"

"Aw, don't tell me you're worked up about being called my lover!" He resorts to teasing next, trying to coax his friend out of his shell. "I thought you liked me, big guy."

Manny sputters out nonsense, his whole face slowly turning a brighter red, if that was even possible. "Of course I- Yeah I like you! God, are you stupid? It's...just nevermind."

Okay, that new fallen look meant he screwed up somewhere. Which meant he needed to do something, and fast! From what he's gathered, it seems like distractions help Manny rather than focusing on the problem. And while he's sure that isn't healthy, he knows it's not his place to step in. The detective taps at the desk, watching with growing worry as his friend seems to become sad once more. While that's all happening, he's spending their silence beating his brain up for something new to talk about. It's one of those times he desperately needs his brain, so of course it stops working for him. Just his luck, huh?

After seeing his friend bury his head back into his crossed arms, he decides to let him go for a bit. Pushing his friend would do nothing, either. And perhaps a full belly of chocolate milkshake would make his brain work, and put the other male in a much better mood for distractions. Until the shake arrives, he'll use his free time thinking. 

Even if it isn't his business, he can't help but wonder what caused the sudden fight between the two sassy friends? From how nasty it was, it's been building up for a while. Though he isn't sure why it blew up when they were all having - what he assumed - was a good time. The whole group was giggling and chatting, playing all the card games Jc could creatively conjure up. Now that he's replaying the memory in his head, Matthew can remember that Nikita and Manny had not sat together like usual. Instead, the troublemaker had been curled up against Roi, while the producer himself had been leaning against him; whispering comments into his ear that caused the detective to snicker. 

Other than that, he hadn't noticed anything else off the whole evening. And as a detective, his senses were always on high alert. Had he just turned a blind eye to it, unknowingly? Mat scowls, bothered by that idea, and has never felt more glad to suddenly see a large glass set in front of him at that very moment. 

Yup, the milkshake was definitely the biggest one they had. His mouth waters from looking at some of the whipped cream falling down the sides of the glass. Somehow he already feels better. Matthew isn't a chocolate guy, but maybe this would change his mind? 

And, like he requested, the waitress giggles as she places two red and white straws in the foam of chocolate and whipped cream. She winks at Manny, who quickly looks away, before skating away and whispering something about 'i wish my boyfriend bought me milkshakes'. A comment that makes him laugh unexpectedly, which he tries to hide by covering his mouth with his fist. When he steals a glance at his companion, he's watching the waitress skate away with a look in his eye that Mat doesn't understand. 

Nervously, he leans forward to take a sip out of the straw. Manny snorts, and pushes the shake to him so he doesn't have to bend over the table. This doesn't sit right with him, and Matthew pulls away after his first drink, looking at his friend suspiciously. 

"It's  _ your  _ shake too! I can't drink this all by myself, I'll puke!" 

His shrill tone makes Manny chuckle, causing a great amount of joy to fill the detective's chest. "And I'll help you drink it, that doesn't mean we can't pull it up and down the table!"

The idea is fine, completely fine and logical, and yet he finds himself feeling something akin to disappointment. He's never shared a milkshake with anyone before, has only heard of it and seen it on pictures, but he always thought you and your lover were supposed to drink from it at the same time. Staring longingly into each other's eyes while you did so. And while Manny isn't his lover by any means, the detective is still upset that this isn't the big  _ romantic  _ moment he always thought it would be. 

Not like he orchestrated this to be a romantic moment! No- he had done it to make Manny feel better, to make him laugh; there was a difference!

Feeling as though he's at war with his own feelings, he pushes the shake back towards Manny. The producer takes it and drinks from his straw, all while Matthew scrambles to once again find a topic to talk about. 

"Milkshakes are weird, huh? I mean, it's basically melted ice cream you're drinking!"

His friend pulls away from his straw, looking interested. "Really?"

"Yup! Er- actually, no! But that's what it tastes like, doesn't it?"

"Yeah, but if it isn't just melted ice cream, then what's it made of?"

"A mystery for another day."

"The great Detective Patrick doesn't know what milkshakes are made of? That's shocking."

Mat's face flushes, "I know exactly what milkshakes are made of, I just don't wanna tell you!" He sticks out his tongue in protest. 

"First of all, that's rude, bitch. Second of all...You're just mean."

"Amazing conclusion."

Manny huffs, pushing the shake back towards the detective. "Just shut up and enjoy, nerd."

"Never. I'm a pure blooded rebel, haven't you heard?" 

All of this small talk is so horrendously stupid. For him, personally, he loves to spend his time indulging into deep topics whenever he's thrust into conversation. Matthew loved knowing how people worked, taking them apart to see the insides of them so he understood them completely. Small talk was boring, uninteresting, and never pulled him in. Except for now. Seeing that barest hint of a smile blossoming on Manny's face at such a stupid topic made him want to never shut up.

It's still clear that Manny wants to withdraw, but he's not able to do so as the conversation keeps dragging on. They keep passing the shake up and down the table, a thing he's sure  _ lovers  _ don't do, though it doesn't matter as they both lose themselves in various amounts of topics. The small talk fades into stupid questions, which leads them into stupid debates. Everything about this is  _ idiotic  _ and  _ foolish _ but Matthew finds himself not wanting to ever leave this table. Soon enough, his friend looks like he forgets all about the earlier flight, as they both start debating on why lizards - of all things - are the best pets. 

One hour passes by, and when the shake is pushed back to Mat, he goes to take a sip out of instinct; surprised when no chocolate hits his tongue. He pulls away and examines it, just now heading Manny's snickers, and realizes that the glass is completely empty. 

"Manny! That was the last of it!"

The producer wheezes between his laughter. "Hey, it was my comfort shake! I deserved the last drink!"

Pretending to be mad isn't something Mat can even do. His strength only extends so far, and no matter what he does, he cannot keep the smile that's forming on his face down. Not when he's oh so  _ fondly  _ watching Manny laugh in front of him. The raven haired man clearly feels better, and he takes great pride in knowing it's all because of him. Seeing Manny struggle to stop laughing and grinning makes his heart race; and yes, Mat finds himself finally giving up and smiling back at the man. 

The rest of the moment goes by smoothly after that. The waitress comes by again with the check, looking annoyed that they're only paying now, but Mat gives her a generous tip for watching them goof off. She takes the money while Matthew shrugs his orange trench coat back on, all while Manny watches the detective with a loving expression. 

Before he starts to shuffle out of the booth, his hand suddenly is pressed against the table by another weight. He looks up, glasses sliding down the bridge of his nose, and a strangled sound escapes him when he realizes Manny's  _ hand  _ is resting firmly on top of his. Brown eyes finally look upwards, and they meet a soft green. A brief moment of silence follows, the two softly staring at each other with emotions they can't name yet, before finally something is said. 

"Thanks, Matty. I- I needed this. Thank you." Manny's voice is a whisper, but Matthew hears it loud and clear. 

Shaking his head, he chuckles. "It's Matthew." But he finds himself not minding the nickname. 

They share another look, smiles tugging on their faces, and Matthew decides he can't say ' _ you're welcome'  _ the way he wants to. So, he moves his free hand out to place on top of Manny's. 

Just like that, the producer tugs away, leaving Mat's free hand midair. 

"I have to go. It's been fun! We should do this again."

Sounds like a date, Mat thinks, as he lowers his hand. "Anytime, Manny."

The producer nods at him before turning on his heels and walking away, and he can't even offer to walk Manny home before the producer's gone. Matthew has half the mind to chase after him, but decides to give the man space. Too much pushing wouldn't do him good; a phrase he repeats to himself until he understands. 

Maybe he'll never know why Nikita and Manny fought, but so what? He doesn't care about that, not today. All he knows is that he was helpful, that he gave Manny what he  _ needed _ when nobody else did _.  _

The detective's heart grows a bit bigger at the thought, and it doesn't take long for another problem to settle into his chest. A personal one he swears to keep to himself. 

It's his problem, after all, not  _ Manny's.  _ A statement he remembers for the rest of the year. 

  
  


**_act III._ **

"Whoever you are, go away."

If he wasn't a man of justice, he would strangle whoever was knocking on his door. Hadn't he made a point that he didn't want to be bothered? So far he's turned everyone away who has tried to talk to him. Even poor Rosanna, who still slipped a plate of food under his door that he ate hours ago. All of his friends have given up on him at this point, except whoever this person was. 

There wasn't a response for a while, and Matthew assumes they suddenly grew a brain and left. He sighs, heart sinking for a reason he doesn't get, before he turns away from the door. Trying his best to readjust on his terribly dirty bed. The covers were thrown about, laying on the floor and only covering one leg, but he couldn't care less. This whole week has been terrible, and Mat deserved a chance to take it all in. To try and see if his anger would settle anytime soon. 

He perks up when he hears the door creak open, mouth agape as he whirls back around. Propped up on his elbows to get a good view without hurting his neck.

It's not even that much of a surprise that the person who slowly enters his room is a raven haired male, with his bold green jumpsuit immediately catching brown eyes. Any urge to strangle the other fades when he realizes it's Manny, and his shoulders slump in defeat. The producer gives him a soft smile as he closes the door. 

"So, they sent you, huh? The last resort?"

Manny laughs, the sound pleasant in tune and soothing to the detective's ears. "I tried to come by sooner, but everyone else wanted to try first." 

"You won't get me out of this room, not right now. Cut your losses while you can."

"Good thing I'm not trying to make you leave then."

That's a new tactic. Brown eyes widen, watching intently as the man makes his way over to the bed with a smile still on his face. It isn't a sly on, or the forced ones he gives to strangers, there's something genuine about it that makes Mat ache. There's no game to be played here, alone in his bedroom while he's at his worst, and everything in the detective appreciates that from his friend. 

One of his best friends, maybe, if he was willing to take such a leap. 

The producer stops beside his bed, looking down at him with a raised brow. He points at the mattress, "Can I lay with you?"

"You want to stay?" With him? When he's like this? Matthew blinks, unsure if his ears had deceived him. 

"Of course I want to stay! You look like you could use the company." He pokes the detective in the shoulder. "Now move over. I don't want to smother you."

Heart pounding, he decides to obey and scooches over on the bed. Laying on the left side as much as he possibly could so the other could fit. Manny hops in, flopping onto a pillow and causing the mattress to bounce at the weight. The producer snickers, all while Mat glares at him. Yet the moment they lock eyes, his glare softens immediately. It's almost sad how quick he lets down his walls around the other man. And he can't even blame it on the years of friendship they held, because Mat has known some of their friends for much longer, and has never felt this with anyone else. 

Seeing the smile on his friend's face is contagious, and even though his mood is still sour, he finds himself smiling back. It's a weaker copy of it, but it's something. Despite the weakness of the smile, Manny's face brightens at seeing it, as if it made his day. He selfishly hopes it did. 

After the moment passes, both of them turn to stare up at the ceiling again. Laying on their backs and listening to the other breathe peacefully. The anger in him calms at this, and he somehow feels a bit better already. All of his friends had tried to drag him out of his room, but the moment he made it clear he wasn't leaving, they all left. Manny's the only one who didn't push at him. The only one who stayed. It's exactly what he had wanted, had needed, and he feels his smile growing stronger with each second that passes. 

He knows the silence makes Manny uncomfortable, feeling the bed move with his shifting, so he tries to say something. "I don't...There isn't much to say about what happened."

"You don't have to talk about it, ya know?" Manny whispers, glancing over at him. 

"I'm just overreacting. Who cares if the mayor put me on leave? I'll be back to my job in a few days."

Just saying it hurts, and he hates that it does. He knows he's being a baby about the whole situation, but he can't stop. His emotions are running wild and have been the whole week. Ever since Janet - their terrible mayor - told him off in front of the whole town for something he can't even remember, and then ripped his badge off his belt, he hasn't felt the same. Being a detective meant everything to him. No matter what happened, he always had his job to look forward to. And now it's gone. Even if it's only temporary, he still feels lost without it. 

And, without even thinking of it, he lets that out. "If I'm not a detective, then who am I?"

He loves Teala, and Ro even more so, but he can't ever tell them these thoughts. It's not like he doesn't trust them, because he does, so much, it's just that he has to be strong for them. They both look up to him and he knows this, they expect so much and all he wants to do is live up to the expectations. The Matthew Patrick in their eyes is capable, unwavering, and a leader. If they saw him like this, know about the doubts he had, they wouldn't see that man anymore. And he can't handle the idea of that. 

Without even noticing it, honey-brown eyes water at the onslaught attack of his own mind. His shoulders shaking as he struggles to hold back sobs as his heart physically breaks in his chest because of all the pressure and pain he feels. The moment he starts to cry, Manny's presence reaffirms itself when the producer scoots closer. And the moment their sides press into one another's, a dam bursts in him and he can't patch it up in time. A sob escapes him, and then another, and then he suddenly can't stop. 

Manny sighs, pressing more firmly against him. "Oh, Matty-"

"It's- it's Matthew-" 

He clings to that so his mind doesn't go off the deep end, knowing it's a silly thing to ground himself with. But he doesn't care, not when he's looking for any reason to no longer focus on his own pain. 

"Matthew….It's alright, honey, really, it is."

It doesn't feel okay, but at least he feels a bit better now that the wave of emotions is finally washing over him. Tears still roll thickly down his wet cheeks, though he now has the energy to bring a shaky hand up to wipe the tears away with his palm. His eyes ache with how hard he's pressing his palm into them, yet he could care less. The quicker he stops crying the better. After the tears are mostly gone, he's stuck with sniffling, trying to regain all of his composer as if he never fell apart in the first place.

There's nothing he hates more than vulnerability. At least, when the person that's being open is him. It's oddly intimate, and it's weird, and he really really hates it with every fiber of his being. And yet he never can stop himself from opening up whenever he's around Manny. The emotions flow off of him naturally, and he feels so safe to express himself on a deeper level when he's alone with the other man. Their relationship is intimate, he realizes, and it's been this way for a long time now. It's not the first time this fact has been shoved in his face, but he still finds himself speechless every time he's faced with it. 

"You aren't just a detective." Is what comes out of Manny after another moment, the words gentle as if not to startle him. 

"Yeah? Then what else am I?"

Manny sends him a smirk. "Don't get me started. Probably the best guy in this town." At his unimpressed look, the producer's smirk turns into a small smile again. "You're also one of my best friends, detective or not."

"One of them?"

"Well, probably my only other best friend. After Nikita, of course."

His heart leaps into his throat, skin tingling with excitement at the bold confession. He feels as if all the air had just been knocked out of him. Which  _ almost _ makes him feel like he's floating, as contradicting as that sounds. It means so much. And yet he finds himself unable to come up with words to tell his friend how much that means to him. While he can go on and on about facts on any random topic he's searched up, he's always struggled to express how he feels with words. There are moments where he hates himself for it, and now is definitely one of those moments. 

But he has to show how much it means to him in some form. The last thing he wants is for Manny to feel rejected. His brain races for a moment, and he comes up with the most simple solution in the world. Maybe the gesture is too bland for most, but if the producer knows him well, then he'll get it. He has to. 

Timidly, he purposely brushes his hand against Manny's. An easy feat since their sides are already pressed together. A surprised noise rumbles out of the producer, but he makes no move to yank his hand away. It's amusing, he thinks, because as touchy as Manny is - he always seems shocked when people touch him in return. But this isn't about that, it's about the fact the detective wants to convey his emotions to his friend in the only way he knows how. 

His hand fumbles a bit, especially since he stubbornly keeps staring at the ceiling, but eventually his hand presses against Manny's. The touch thrills him like nothing else, and he can't stop himself from grinning after his hand settles there. 

Manny, after a moment, squeezes his hand, before his grip loosens. The action makes him laugh, and while he isn't sure why, he thinks it's because he's just...happy. Genuinely happy. The anger is still there with the sad ache he feels, but he feels so much better already. And he still needs time before he can fully feel okay after everything that happened, but this is a start, and that's all that matters. In his opinion, anyway. 

The detective sighs, content, and turns around towards his friend. He lets go of the other's hand, which makes Manny's face fall, but the producer clearly wasn't expecting Mat to cuddle into his side. The fawn haired male nuzzles his face into the other's next, listening gleefully to him gasp. His arm comes up so he can drape it along Manny's chest, the other arm pressed smugly between them. For a long time his friend remains frozen up, until he finally seems to relax back into the sheets. And relaxes into the detective's arms. 

"You tired already?"

"Emotions do that to you."

His reveal makes Manny hum. "Yeah, I know. Crying makes me feel exhausted too."

Mat grunts in response, concerned for Manny, yet still not in the mood to take on the burden of someone else's feelings. Luckily, he knows this won't be held against him, and has no trouble forgetting his friend's statement as he slowly drifts off. In all honesty, he's never held someone in his own bed before. It's a weird experience and a welcomed one, especially since the other makes no moves to hold him in turn, which he appreciates. Matthew didn't trust his feelings to not go haywire if Manny touched him back, especially when he's in distress and they're laying in a bed together.  _ Alone _ . 

The feeling of skin against his lips - even if he isn't purposely trying to kiss the other's neck - makes him feel soft and calm. And the steady heartbeat that he can practically hear only further alates him. There's nothing like this; like holding someone you deeply care for when you're upset, and them letting you. The trust between them makes Mat almost choke up again, but his eyes are too burnt out to cry anymore tears, thankfully. 

Sleep finds him quickly, and when he wakes up the next morning still in his friend's arms, he's never felt more well rested. 

**_epilogue._ **

Whiskey mixed with bourbon wasn't the best thing he could resort to, yet he knows it will give him some sort of comfort in this hellhole of a town. 

Sure, it absolutely  _ burns  _ his throat, and Mat keeps coughing it up, but it still numbs his mind all the same. His hand is wrapped around the handle of the bottle as he walks down the empty street of Everlock. Everyone is off the streets considering how early it is, and it makes the loneliness hit even harder. What was he still doing here? There was barely anything left. Brown eyes water at the painful thought, so he dunks his head back and takes another gulp of the liquor. Somehow, he manages to hold it in his throat, flinching at the gross taste. But hey, at least he's starting to keep it down. 

Mind still working a mile a minute, he takes more gulps of the Jim Beam in his shaky hands. Desperate to feel nothing but warmth in his belly. Matthew has never been into alcohol, ever, but he's starting to see the appeal the more he drinks. Hopefully a whole bottle of the stuff wouldn't kill him. He's at his wits end, but he isn't suicidal, not yet anyway. 

When he finally comes to a stop, wobbling on his tired legs, his heavy eyes trail towards the house. Huh. How strange the human heart and mind is. The walk he took originally had been mindless, just wandering around with the bottle, and yet here he is. In front of Manny's house. Of all the places his feet could carry him to, of course it would be here. Drunk, alone, and tired at his friend's front door. Usually, he would be ashamed to be seen in this state, but Manny had always been different. That man knew every ugly side Mat had. What was him, showing up drunk, going to do? He would be accepted, he always is by  _ Manny.  _

Thinking about the record producer doesn't fill him with comfort, or joy, anymore. None of his friends do. Everyone is gone, or will be gone. In a couple days, he would be all by himself in a ghost town. Forever a chapter in everyone's lives as they move on without him. 

Safiya and Teala left almost a month ago, Jc soon after with Roi, and Rosanna left...she left  _ yesterday.  _ And he had acted brave, just like she needed him to act. All smiles and teary eyes and  _ 'it's okay, Ro!'  _

What about him? Where was his reassurance? Where was his  _ 'everything will work out, Mat?' _

He doesn't get those comforting words, all because he isn't leaving like everyone else. No, he's fine! Matthew's totally fine in everyone else's eyes! But he's so sick and tired of being okay. His grip tightens on the handle of the bottle, mouth quirking into a deep scowl. For once, he wants to be angry, and upset, and greedy. In a few days Manny, Nikita, Joey, and Colleen will leave him too. They all have such big plans. 

Colleen wants to party in the big apple, Nikita wants to move countries to see the sights, who knows what the fuck Joey wants...and Manny? 

Of course the record producer wants to finally go back home, to California, Los Angeles. Everlock was never permanent for him apparently. A fact Matthew didn't know until it was too late. 

The anger he feels is something he should try to control, because he won't ever forgive himself if he lashed out at his friend, but he's unwilling to give up the bottle. Matthew takes another swig before finally gaining the confidence to knock on the door. 

When it finally opens, he can't even imagine what a sight he must be to Manny. Who is looking at him like he isn't even  _ Everlock's best detective  _ anymore, and maybe he isn't. Here he stands, completely open and raw, as Matthew Patrick. 

He's opened up a lot to Manny over the years, but never like this. The intimacy is more intense than it's ever been. 

"Mat? What's up? You didn't tell me you were coming over! Do you want to help me pack-" Once Manny's gaze lands on the bottle at the detective's side, his eyes go wide. "Are you drinking?"

Oh, how very observant, he thinks with a roll of his eyes. "Yup. Course I am." 

"I thought you didn't like to drink…."

"I don't."

His friend falls silent, eyebrows knitted together in confusion. And if he looks hard enough, there's worry etched on the man's face. 

Deciding to keep it short and sweet, he points a finger towards Manny. "Are you going to invite me in?"

Even if the producer took a second to answer, he knew he would cave for him eventually. Matthew could - and has - shown up on this man's door critically injured, and he's been let inside nonetheless. So when Manny steps aside, he brushes past the raven haired man with no problem. 

The house looks barren when he enters. A fact that makes Mat's blood run cold through his veins. Once the whole living room had been filled with life, pictures and makeup scattered everywhere, and clothes thrown about. Now? It's so empty. Save for the stuff on the floor and the items that fill the boxes that now litter the whole room. The sight takes his breath away, causing Matthew to back up; his whiskey bottle now cradled to his chest. This only results in him slamming right into the producer, who touches his shoulder in turn. 

While the touch is gentle, it burns with the same intensity as the whiskey, and he pulls away. Turning around to face Manny with a vicious look. The whiskey was supposed to numb it all, but so far all it's done is intensify every emotion. What a mess. How could he have miscalculated this so bad? 

The producer looks hurt, though he doesn't say anything. And for a moment, they just stare at each other. Mat wonders why his friend is suddenly so speechless. After all the snarky words, flirty comments, and comforting phrases- the man is only  _ now  _ speechless? The thought makes him more angry. 

He swallows the anger down, instead forcing a wicked smile. Mat turns back around and extends his arms in a grand gesture. "Well, it seems like you're on your way out!"

Silence. 

It feels like he's being ignored. Matthew breathes in, trying to not snap off. Instead he tries another approach. 

"It's a good thing I caught you before you left, then! I actually have some things to say to you. The first thing is a personal plea, if you're willing to hear it."

He glances at the producer over his shoulder, his expression completely fake. Nonetheless, he watches Manny intently. Taking in how he won't even look Mat's way, and insists on glancing around instead. Manny shuffles his feet, as he places his hands on his hip. His face is a whirlwind of emotions that the detective can't quite catch. 

"You can say whatever, Mat." Manny mumbles. 

Okay, fine, keep it simple then. Matthew fully turns around, and for a moment, his happy mask breaks. He just isn't strong enough to hold it up. His smile twitches into a small line. And soon enough his brown eyes water, before he manages to hold them in. The plea wasn't even going to work, he knew this, but it was worth a try. The hardest part would come after. 

Yeah, he didn't plan on any of this, but he had to get this all off his chest. If he didn't, then...he wasn't sure what he would do. 

"I want you to stay."

"Stay?" 

"Yes! Stay! Stay here in Everlock with me."

When Manny says nothing, Mat starts to ramble, the alcohol getting to him. "You don't have to go back! I know you like it here, and I know you like  _ me,  _ so why leave?"

Manny looks down at his feet, "It's not that simple."

"Actually, yes, it  _ is  _ that simple! What do you want me to do, Manny? Beg?"

"No, of course not! Matthew, what's wrong with you?"

Something in him wants to scream to the clouds that  _ everything _ is what's wrong with him. But he growls and holds it back, looking at the bottle in his hand with a glare. 

All the worry coming from Manny only makes his heart hurt more. "You can talk to me, remember? Why aren't you acting-"

"Why am I acting crazy? Well, probably because my life is falling apart! But hey, that's just a guess!" 

"..I was going to ask why aren't you acting like yourself."

He shrugs, eyelids feeling heavy from his heavy drinking. For a moment, he fiddles with the bottle in his hands, before deciding he's done with it- and sets it on the table next to the couch. The dark brown liquid still looks comforting and warm, but he can't concentrate on the drink anymore. All of him is suddenly focused on his friend. Or soon-to-be former friend, if he's letting himself face the gravity of the situation. 

Facing Manny like this was something he's never wanted to do, ever. Yet here he is! Drunk off his ass and all of his feelings are on display for the producer to see. His eyes soften when he notices how tired the man looks, how he seems to be in pain from seeing Mat like this. And at the same time? Matthew doesn't even care. It's terrible to admit, but for once he's glad someone is hurting over him for once. His hands start to tremble now that he isn't holding onto some object, so he clutches at his own orange jacket and watches as Manny tries to put on another mask himself. 

"I still have something else to say."

"Okay…" The producer whispers, running a hand through his black hair, a nervous tick he picked up from Mat, no doubt. "What is it?"

If he doesn't say it now, he never will. Matthew opens his mouth, and closes it. He searches his brain for a logical way to say this, though he can't find the right words. And his heart is even more of a mess, so it looks like he'll just have to be blunt about it. 

Now wasn't the time for heartfelt confessions, anyway. 

"I love you."

There's a moment where Manny just stares at him, nose scrunched up in confusion. "I know, I love you too-"

"Not like that! It's not that kind of affection. It's something else." Matthew groans in frustration, pressing the palms of his hands against his eyes. "I  _ love  _ you."

When he finally looks at his friend, he finds only a blank expression there. Manny seems to freeze up for a moment, as if he can't process what he's heard, and Mat restrains the urge to go and shake him. What he wants, more than anything, is to hear it back. Or to hear the man reject him. All he needs is closure before he lets Manny go. The man finally seems to come back to reality, green eyes flickering nervously to the side.

"Why are you telling me this now?"

"Are you not going to respond?" 

His friend's shoulders slump, Manny's lips pulling into a frown. "This won't change anything, I'm still going back."

"I don't care! Just talk to me!" Matthew's patience thins, causing him to storm over to poke his finger into the producer's chest. 

Manny pulls away and slams his back into the door. "Matthew." He warns, acting brave, but he hears the shake in his friend's words. 

"Oh, so now it's Matthew. It's been  _ Matty  _ all these years, and now that you're leaving me, it's suddenly Matthew?" 

"You never liked the nickname to begin with!"

At this point, both of their voices are rising in volume. His gut twists in guilt, knowing he's driving Manny to such anger. Yet he can't stop himself. Matthew has kept this loneliness in for a whole month, and has kept these feelings inside for even longer. Everything comes to a boiling point eventually. His hands curl into fists at his side as he glares at his  _ definitely not  _ friend now, who narrows his eyes back with the same emotions in them. 

"Fine." The producer spits. "I love you. Is that all you wanted to hear? That I'm in love with you?"

What should've felt like relief only feels like he was splashed with cold water. "Yeah. That's all I wanted to hear."

"I can't believe you."

Mat shrugs his shoulders, a small smile tugging at his lips. "I can't believe you either. How long did you keep those feelings in for, Manny?" 

"Fuck off."

At first he almost laughs, but when he finally notices the incredibly sad look on the other's face, his smile falls completely. And so does his heart. 

Suddenly, none of this is no longer amusing. Any victory he once felt vanishes when he sees Manny furiously wiping away the tears in his eyes. Mat feels like someone just beat him nearly to death at the sight. Yes, he was mad, and yes he was so so happy Manny felt the same way, but he didn't want things to end like this. His hand reaches out, wanting to help a person he loves so dearly, before he lets it drop after he has second thoughts. Instead, he watches as the man pulls himself together. And wonders where Manny keeps getting his strength from, because Mat has run out of his a long time ago. 

The detective sucks in a breath and stares down at his feet. He doesn't even know how to say sorry without sounding like an ass. Words still weren't his strong suit, and for a moment he just stands there. Rocking back and forth on his heels as he waits for Manny to kick him out. But all the man seems busy doing is sniffling and wiping at his face some more. 

They can't leave things like this. Despite how he's acting, everything in him loves the producer. Mat knows this for a fact. And the only way he knows how to show his love for the man is…

Even if he won't remember all this tomorrow, he has to try. Mat looks back at Manny, who suddenly locks eyes with him. 

He takes a small step forward, hand reaching out again- as if asking for permission. Green eyes glance at it, wary, but he makes no move to stop Matthew. 

It then only takes a second to cup Manny's face in his hands. He holds his friend's face with all the care in the world, brushing his own nose against Manny's to once again give the man a chance to back down. 

The producer goes still, before Mat feels a soft kiss pressed against the corner of his mouth. Okay.  _ Okay _ , they were really doing this then. There was no going back. Once he commits to this, Mat knew he wouldn't be able to stop. 

This was such a stupid plan. Truly, the stupidest plan ever. 

"Second thoughts?" 

The question makes him chuckle, and he shyly pecks at Manny's lips. "No. You?"

"No."

"Good."

After that, he has no problem slamming his lips fully against Manny's. It's a desperate blur the moment their lips connect, the two men immediately trying to eliminate all the space between them. The detective is quick to grip at his friend's waist, pressing him more firmly against the door. Which only causes Manny to run his hands through Mat's soft, brown hair. Their kiss doesn't have the chance to be chaste anymore, not with how eager they both are to have one, big final moment together. 

It's so clear Manny has wanted this for as long as Mat has, maybe even more so, and that thought alone is a welcomed one. The producer never fails to make him feel  _ wanted _ . One of the many reasons he's fallen for the man pressed right against him. 

Everything he wants to say, wants to admit to, bleeds into the kiss. And Manny kisses back with the same unsaid emotions. It's perfect. It's everything he wants. Or mostly everything he would've wanted. This feverish kiss won't change his friend's mind, and Mat knows this because he knows the producer like the back of his hand. 

This would've been  _ perfect  _ if he had done it sooner. 

But he'll deal with the consequences years from now, probably. His mind practically shuts off when he feels his bottom lip being tugged at, which causes his hands fumbling about to just feel at Manny, and everything else that follows after that feels like pure instinct. Like he was made to be with the producer in such a raw, physical way. Their bodies match almost as perfectly as their personalities do, and it takes hours for them to finally roll off of each other and take a breath. Everything aches and his lips feel swollen to hell, but for a few hours he feels okay. Genuinely okay. And Manny, with his big goofy grin, apparently feels the same way too. 

No, this wouldn't change what was coming, but at least he had this for now. Even if he ends up hating the producer after he's gone, there will always be this moment of pure love that neither of them can take back. 

And to Mat, as he lays in Manny's bed absolutely exhausted, that's all he could ask for. 

One last  _ good  _ memory. 


End file.
